A debate began on the internet when the mother said she doesn’t want to allow anyone except her and her partner to change her newborn baby’s diapers.
Not even the grandparents of the child are allowed to do this as she must protect her baby’s privacy.
A concerned mum shared her problem on the British parenting website named Mumsnet, that her mother-in-law changed the nappies of her child without her permission and this thing annoyed her a lot.
“I’m very keen on consent and protecting my baby’s privacy and prefer that only myself and my partner are the ones to change DS’s nappy (6 months)” she wrote.
“Obviously, I understand if we’re not available due to nursery eventually or if someone else is babysitting then I’m happy for someone else to do it however this has not yet been the case.”
She further added, “a while ago my MIL was over and my baby started crying and rather than just give him back decided to take it upon herself to change him (I was standing right there) he continued crying throughout the change and she gave him back straight after but it annoyed me as it wasn’t her place to change him.”
The mother told that she didn’t say a single word to her mother-in-law at that time because she didn’t want to be rude to her, however, from now she decided to draw a line so that no one can change her baby’s nappies apart from her and her husband.
“I didn’t say anything at the time DS was 4 months and I was trying to be nice and friendly but starting to find her more overbearing and I’m getting close to drawing a line.”
After reacting to her post, some people supported her, while many of them bashed the angry mother by saying that she was overreacting without any reason.
“It’s good to be aware but you do sound paranoid. They are related and you were right there watching. Did something happen to you as a child? If so, maybe you need therapy to talk through things. Or maybe you could have said, it’s OK I can do that or something,” someone wrote.
“I think this is something you seriously need to address with yourself.
First of all, all my family members have offered to change nappies, and 9/10 it’s because they’re being helpful and just giving me a tiny break. I think it’s a lovely thing for them to do. I really don’t understand why you feel the way you do. But it does seem like you have your own underlining problem. If you can’t trust immediate family to change a nappy then, well, your child is going to grow up with you literally obsessing over ‘privacy’ for them,” a second comment read.
“So nursery workers or babysitters can change your child but their grandparent can’t? I suspect this is more about your feelings towards your MIL than anything to do with privacy and consent (consent being a ridiculous concept for a small baby who has no capacity to give informed consent at that age),” a third added.
“I don’t understand the logic here. If you’re genuinely worried about privacy and consent in these matters, then surely nursery must be a total no go?” a fourth wrote.
“Totally ridiculous and irrationally paranoid, assuming this is genuine and not yet another MIL hating thread,” another penned.
